Therapy for Narcissistic Abuse in Divorce

You Became Their “World” in an Instant

Your relationship moved at warp speed, and your partner appeared amazing.

Flooded by “I love you’s” and compliments, they swept you off your feet.

You looked past the hurriedness of it all and believed you were “soul mates.”

Things Changed Overnight

It didn’t take long for the cracks in your relationship to show.

It started with jokes and condescending remarks about you. When you brought up concerns, your experience was denied and you were called “too sensitive and overly emotional.”

You questioned your perception, but things only got worse, and there was never any real accountability. All the private things you shared that were once complimented were now used as ammunition against you.

Before you could even wrap your head around the changes, your partner decided you were no longer “good enough,” and the smear campaign against you began.

Narcissistic Abuse

Emotional abuse is one of the hallmarks of a narcissistic personality in relationships, though physical, sexual, and economic abuse also often occur.

While sometimes difficult to identify, narcissists lack true empathy and remorse. They are self-interested perpetual victims with fragile inflated egos who eventually discard you if you don’t agree with everything they say or do. 

They have no problem dragging your reputation through the mud and may seek to ruin you financially or otherwise.

Sadly, narcissists often view their children as beings to be controlled and used as vehicles to hurt the other parent.

The Narcissistic Personality in Divorce

Divorce is stressful for many reasons.

Not only do you go through mourning your former life (or the one you thought you had), but you end up having to deal with the anxiety of starting over.

Divorcing a narcissist is an entirely different animal.

These personality types almost only engage in “high conflict” divorce. They will file endless motions and spend countless sums of money to win against you, and mediation is often futile.

The court and other agencies exist as platforms for narcissistic personalities to lie, manipulate, make false accusations, and grandstand.

Unfortunately, you are often presumed to be at fault, even if your focus is on protecting your children.

Support During a High Conflict Divorce

Many professionals specialize in therapy for divorce, but few understand the dynamics involved with battling a narcissist in court, parallel parenting with one, or starting over in the wake of such devastation and exhaustive conflict. It’s a particular brand of awful for which most people don’t even have a template and can’t imagine.

Traditional therapy usually focuses on helping people live authentically. While that’s a worthy life goal, things like self-disclosure, vulnerability, and emotional honesty can be damaging when divorcing or dealing with a narcissist.

In addition to processing all the stress, gaslighting, and trauma, it’s imperative that you learn to think strategically.

Communicating with narcissistic personality types is incredibly challenging. Nothing is straight-forward, and there’s usually a hidden agenda.

You’re going to need to work with someone who understands how to stay grounded while trying to rebuild your life amidst constant chaos.

You Don’t Have to Do This Alone

What you are going through is an emotional roller coaster. Keep focusing on what matters.

Remind yourself that this is temporary, even if it feels like it will never end.

And find people who are in your corner.

Call me at (720) 845-6600 or email drjodiebenabe@somethingwildwellness.com if you’re dealing with narcissistic abuse or need support during a high conflict divorce.